Excitement...
I just got an email from our CM that we are allowed to send a care package to Derek. We don't have an address yet but hope to within a few days. I am already starting to contemplate what to put in the box. I will make a small album of a few pictures with American & Vietnamese translation in hopes the nannies will show him the book frequently. I will also send a blankie and a few toys. I am going to put something in for each of the children there. I can't wait to send it off to him. This brings much contentment to the fear of him not coming home. I now feel more confident that Derek will be HOME it will just be a little more time.

I am so nervous....
As most of you know, Vietnam time is 12 hours ahead of us here so that will officially make tonight November 1st there and as we lay our heads onto our pillows tonight and TRY to fall asleep the anticipation of "The Meeting" taking place there will mount inside if us. This will be a meeting that will hopefully be successful and provide us a light at the end of this hellish long tunnel. It will be the opportunity to demand the orphanage director to fix the baby dossiers and hopefully convince her to do it quickly. Wouldn't it be grand to get word for Christmas that our babies will soon be home. Today will be long and tomorrow even longer as we await our weekly update on Friay that will produce the results of "The Meeting" tonight.

On a side note, I wass cleaning up the yard and flower beds yesterday and poked myself in the corner of the eye with a branch (stupid move I know) and now have a dandy shiner. Makes for a diversion question for everyone to ask intead of an empty answered adoption question.

We received this update late this afternoon.....

J** has been working in Hanoi this week, but he is expecting the Nov 1st meeting to be a major event - PC officials, DOLISA, and the orphanage director will all attend the meeting, together with (Our Agency) representatives will keep families posted on the result of the meeting.

(Our Agency) has hired a local associate and a part time consultant in Da Nang in order to help J** deal with the L.C. orphanage affairs in a prompt manner. J** said he has more reasons to believe that the child dossiers can be fixed.

....so this is another positive side to our saga. We will anxiously await our update next week as that should really shed light on what needs to take place to correct the problem at hand.

Thanks again for your continued support and concern for our son and our family.

The uncertainty of this adoption we are swirled in the midst of has been udderly ridiculous and exhausting. I just feel like I can't go on fighting this. We now find out that the I600 form is going to be handled differently which for all of us who are going to be traveling (sometime) it is GOOD. It will most likely shed a week off of our in country stay. Lord knows this is good because I just want to get Derek in my home and move on with our lives. However...due to the fact that Derek's dossier is on screwed up mess with no end in sight to the repair of it, it could be an eternity yet until we get to the point of filing the I600. My concern is also that it is a 60 day process and there are documents in the baby dossier that must accompany the form and well.....the dossier is screwed up and the agency "has no access" to it. Therefore we don't even have an upfront abandonment report. I don't even know the real story as to how Derek got where he is. I have asked for it but was told there is "no access" to that information at this time. This whole process seems shady to me. Anyway I think it sounds like I am babbling so I will stop for now. We have also once again requested pictures and updates 2 weeks ago and still have not received any of that. As I sid before you would think this agency would be bending backwards for our comfort in the situation. Really with the agency president over there wouldn't you think taking a little time to send a few pictures and maybe a word or so about how Derek is doing would be the least the man could do. I realize he is busy trying to correct the problems that lie within the dossier mess but really a quick few pictures and we would be calmed for a week or so. We should be able to get something.
Okay I am stopping now.....

We got our update phone call this morning. we have been issued a form which might I add for those of you who have been following this for the duration...it is "THE FORM" that we have waited for since waaaay back when. We have been instructed to print the form, sign it, and FedEx it back to our CM for Monday. She will notarize it and send it off to the AZ office to forward to Vietnam. This is a step in a good direction. Not the end yet but a good step. We have been told that once the DIA has this document in our dossier they will forward it to the DOJ of Danang (where Derek is) and they can then beging their DEMAND for the orphanage director to fix her mistakes on the baby dossier and they will be matched together and the process will continue in a positive direction. I hope this means good and quick things are happening. I am setting our travel goal at May. It would be great to go before but I don't want to open a door that will once again slam on our noses. All in all I feel good about this news and I am looking forward to getting more info next week.

BTW did you all check out my new ticker????

Well tomorrow should be a BIG day. We are expecting some kind of news...hopefully I'm not setting myself up for a huge disappointment. News could come in many degrees at this point. I have requested from our agency updated pictures, measurements and the developmental update that I asked for 2 months ago and was promised. We'll see how compliant they choose to be at this point. We received our packet of info about the possible 2nd adoption we would like to dive into but have no energy to do so. It is financially hard for us to do but if it is meant to be we will find a way. If only I were a good fundraising type of person. I would never make a good salesgirl that's for sure.

On an exciting note we are making plans to hop a plane to California to spend a few days with Michelle & Jeff. I can't wait to see her again. I am really missing her. I think a little adoption bonding time is needed. Not to mention I can't wait to take my FIRST plane ride and to see L.A. This is going to be great!!!

Stay tuned for what I hope to be a "good" update tomorrow!!!

We still have nothing NEW to report here. We are expecting an update on Friday and hopefully it will be a GOOD one. Our agency forwarded out an update yesterday to all families in the VN program explaining the delay which I was glad to see them do this way everyone knows what is going on and what to expect. Naturally our paqperwork delay will cause a backload for the other families in line waiting. Seems so unfair. I never imagined we would get so tangled up in this type of web. I am still trying to sort out in my head how this all happened and I just can't get to a rational reasoning no matter how many angles I try to look at. I have sorta started slipping into my anxiety and semi depression mode. Last night we went to Gymboree to buy a gift card for a friend of ours (we chose to do a g.c. since I just can't think about going to see their new baby and hold her in my arms while I am longing so badly for Derek to be there) and I left the store in tears. I want to buy things for Derek and I can't because the situation is still so shaky and I don't know when or entirely "if" he's coming home for sure. This is so hard.
Well I am trying to occupy my time by cleaning up the basement. We just got the girls a treadmill so Alyssa can continue running during her sports off seasons(which are few and far between) so I had to make a little extra room. The salon is very quiet this week and I'm not sure if that is good or bad. It just gives me more time to sit and think and stir around on this crazy computer.
We have requested information from another agency about another adoption. We will still carry through with Derek's adoption because even though not legally yet we are his parents and he does belong here. We will pursue another country through a different agency and hope that it is a smoother transition than this one has been.
Well when we get that update on Friday I will post the news.

We received an update today that sounded a little more upbeat and positive. The PC has recommended that the adoptions be pursued and that it will just take more time (not sure how long yet) and that it is still possible that we will be bringing Derek home eventually. We hope that the documents are fixable in a timely manner and that it won't take months. We are supposed to be getting weekly updates on Fridays now from Vietnam. This is a good thing and we are looking forward to hopefully better news soon!!!!
Thanks again for your continued support!

Thank you to all who requested to continue to follow our adoption. We have not had any more news and we aren't anticipating any for about 2 more weeks. The wait has been gruelling and it isn't getting any easier. I have maintained strength through this and have relied alot on Ativan to get me through the panic attacks. Looking at the nursery and the many piles of clothing have been so hard the past few weeks. We have started looking into compiling a new dossier for another country and hope to have that completed by Christmas or before. We still intend to pursue the adoption of Derek if the agency returns with news that he is still adoptable. We just don't want to wait to hold our child so we have decided to plunge forward and if we are meant to have 2 more children that that is the way it will work out for us. Keep us in your thoughts and we will continue to update you as we receive news.

Due to some things we have encountered in our adoption process we have made a very hard decision about this blog. We have been forced to change this to a private invitation only blog. I will be making the final cutoff on October 10th so that you will all have plenty of time to get on the list. If you would like to be put onto the invitation list you are welcome to leave us a comment and include your email address. Thanks for following our journey and as soon as things smooth out we will be back on here for all of you to follow to the end. Thanks for all of your wonderful comments and your much needed prayers and support.