TEENAGERS....Just what does make them TICK??????
Okay so this a little off the adoption topic but yesterday I had a bad day. My oldest daughter, Alyssa, is turning 16 in April so I thought I wanted to be the "Good Mom" and buy her a car. Well with Norm owning his garage and all we found a car that needs some engine attention (easily done by Norm) and a few paint touch ups (easily done by our tenant) and a little interior cleaning (easily done by the "good mom") and it will be on the road. Well Norm went and picked up thecar on Monday night and I was so excited about getting it. It is a 1997 black Chevy Cavalier 2 door sporty little thing. She will look so cute in it. Here's the deal..... I took her to show it to her yesterday when she got home from school (because I just can't keep a surprise and certainly couldn't keep it a secret for 2 months) and she took one look at it and wrinkled up her nose and rolled her eyes and said it is ugly. My mouth dropped and my eyes swelled with tears and anger raged all at one time. As if my day wasn't emotional enough and now she just triggered every one of them again. So now I have this cute little car with my money invested in it and she doesn't even like it. TEENAGERS!!!!! AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!! So now I need to decide do I just go ahead and clean it up, have Norm fix it up, put in some cute seat covers, a nifty air freshner, and a tank of gas and top it with a bow for her birthday anyway and hope that on that day she is having a not so cranky day and decides she loves it or do I just clean it up have Norm fix it up and turn around and sell it to make some extra adoption money and let her find her own darn car when she turns 16. Any suggestions????
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
We actually got a bit of good news today. After a little pressure from me onto our CM for some clearer pictures I found out that once the child dossier is complete it will not have to do it's usual 30 days to the P.C. & 30 days to the local police because they have been so closely involved in the case that it will just be a formality for them to sign the adoption paperwork. I am waiting for word back when they expect that we can fill out our I600. The DOJ & PC still aren't totally back in their offices from the Tet holiday so it has things slowed up still. BUMMER!!! However once the dossier is done and the DOJ approves it then it will get translated and Commonwealth will send it along with our I600 off to the USCIS in HCMC and we wait for our approval and travel date. So once the I600 is filed hopefully 30-60 days later we will be packing our bags. This is very encouraging to me as it has been a bad day for my emotions today. We will hopefully get a full update the end of the week with clearer images of the steps to come. I have asked again for an outline of what steps need to be taken yet before we get our G&R date so hopefully they will come through with a rough plan for us to ponder over. But all in all it is sounding better and I am holding my breath that we can have those babies in our arms for Mother's Day!!!!
On March 4th 2007 our telephone rang and when I answered I heard the voice of our CM. I knew it was going to be something exciting. It was that day that we made the decision to accept the referral of "our son" Derek. It will be 1 year ago in 2 weeks that we laid our eyes and hearts upon Derek. It has been quite a year thus far. So much alot has (and hasn't) happened in our adoption process. We now await th elusive "signature" and the appoval of the DOJ and the USCIS to see if we can finally bring our little boy home. He has grown so much in this past year. We have missed so much of his life but yet we know we have so much of his life to share with him yet. We long to hold his tiny hand and see his eyes sparkle as he smiles at us. We long to hear him call us "Mommy & Daddy". We still have alot of red tape to break through on this and we ask that you continue to pray for us as the updates bring us closer to G&R day. We anticipate an upate hopefully today so watch here for breaking news. Our "No Update" note we got on Friday told us that we would get "new information" early this week. We'll see what they come through with for us!!!
Friday, February 15, 2008
Another crappy Friday....
NO UPDATE!!!! Once again we received the elusive "No DaNang Update" email today and once again they say we will get early next week but for our agency that never seems to come. We are just slightly peeved today over this. We didn't get an update last week either because of Tet. I just hope when they finally give us one that it is telling us they obtained "The Signature" and that Derek's dossier is complete and on it's way to translation. We NEED the next few weeks to go by quickly as this is getting to be depressing again. Derek NEEDS to come home!!!! Please continue to pray!!!!
NO UPDATE!!!! Once again we received the elusive "No DaNang Update" email today and once again they say we will get early next week but for our agency that never seems to come. We are just slightly peeved today over this. We didn't get an update last week either because of Tet. I just hope when they finally give us one that it is telling us they obtained "The Signature" and that Derek's dossier is complete and on it's way to translation. We NEED the next few weeks to go by quickly as this is getting to be depressing again. Derek NEEDS to come home!!!! Please continue to pray!!!!
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
WHAT TO MY WONDERING EYES DID APPEAR....
I opened my email this afternoon for the bazillionth time in hopes of a glimmer of news and "SURPRISE, SURPRISE" there was a new picture of Derek and a measurement update. He is now 26 pounds and 33 inches. To the best of our knowledge we have been told he is around 14 months old. I'm not sure how that holds out with the medical charts but none the less he is growing and looks healthy. He is so dang cute too!!! If you'd like us to pass on his picture to you leave us a comment with your email address at the end of this and we'll send it out to you!!!
Thanks for praying!!!
I opened my email this afternoon for the bazillionth time in hopes of a glimmer of news and "SURPRISE, SURPRISE" there was a new picture of Derek and a measurement update. He is now 26 pounds and 33 inches. To the best of our knowledge we have been told he is around 14 months old. I'm not sure how that holds out with the medical charts but none the less he is growing and looks healthy. He is so dang cute too!!! If you'd like us to pass on his picture to you leave us a comment with your email address at the end of this and we'll send it out to you!!!
Thanks for praying!!!
The excitement and anticipation builds as the updates roll in each week. I spoke with our CM yesterday and she reminded me to stay cautiously excited. We are expecting to be working on our I600 in the next 2 weeks and returning that to be sent to the VN officials at the end of the month. With Derek's dossier approaching completion (FINALLY) at the end of the month we are looking at the fact that it still needs a few more investigations and approvals before we get the ultimate....G&R date and travel word. The dossier will have to be reviewed by the Peoples Committee and the Local Police after the final translation. Each entity is legally allowed 30 days for their review. Then it will travel to the DIA for approval and off to the DOJ for our G&R date to be issued. In amongst all of that going on the USCIS will be reviewing it also to give us the approval to get a visa for Derek. So as you can see it is still a process however we are much further along than we were 6 months ago. We are still noy out of the woods on appovals and so forth but we have great faith that all will go smoothly and we are praying that the entities involved in reviews yet will not take their full alloted time. Since all of the entities are so involved over the past 6 months we think there may be a possibility that they will roll the dossier along quicker. Hopeful thinking!!!!
Today Derek is 14 months old. WOW!!! We will have so much to learn about him. I am so curious about his personality. I have so many questions that I wish we could get answered. I guess we'll figure it out when he's in our arms.
Many people ask us each day how we have remained strong through this and whether our agency is being honest and trustworthy. I have seen such a remarkable turn around in our agency in the past 3 months that I now feel that they are really trying to acheive the best final result for our adoption. No they aren't taking our money since we don't have to pay anymore that the initial fees. It hasn't been a case of since it is taking so long we have to send more money. They are supplying for our children with what we have invested thus far. It really isn't about the money...it's about the love we hold in our hearts for Derek. We aren't buying a child...we are loving a child!!!! I know without the support of Norm, Diane, Michelle, and many friends and family I couldn't have forged forward as we have. I was ready to turn my cheek long ago and give up but others have made me see that I have to fight on, I have to give it 100%. Derek is so loved in many ways and has no clue. When he FINALLY arrives he will be showered with the love that a child needs.
So we are asking that you continue to pray for our process and we will continue to keep you informed of any progress or changes. There will be a quiet spell over the next few weeks since that is the time for TET Celebration in Vietnam. This is their holiday time. We will be doing some behind the scenes work such as that I600 and so on but the updates won't produce much progress as the celebration goes on in Vietnam. And believe me when this is all done and Derek is home with us we will be having a big celebration of our own!!!!
Today Derek is 14 months old. WOW!!! We will have so much to learn about him. I am so curious about his personality. I have so many questions that I wish we could get answered. I guess we'll figure it out when he's in our arms.
Many people ask us each day how we have remained strong through this and whether our agency is being honest and trustworthy. I have seen such a remarkable turn around in our agency in the past 3 months that I now feel that they are really trying to acheive the best final result for our adoption. No they aren't taking our money since we don't have to pay anymore that the initial fees. It hasn't been a case of since it is taking so long we have to send more money. They are supplying for our children with what we have invested thus far. It really isn't about the money...it's about the love we hold in our hearts for Derek. We aren't buying a child...we are loving a child!!!! I know without the support of Norm, Diane, Michelle, and many friends and family I couldn't have forged forward as we have. I was ready to turn my cheek long ago and give up but others have made me see that I have to fight on, I have to give it 100%. Derek is so loved in many ways and has no clue. When he FINALLY arrives he will be showered with the love that a child needs.
So we are asking that you continue to pray for our process and we will continue to keep you informed of any progress or changes. There will be a quiet spell over the next few weeks since that is the time for TET Celebration in Vietnam. This is their holiday time. We will be doing some behind the scenes work such as that I600 and so on but the updates won't produce much progress as the celebration goes on in Vietnam. And believe me when this is all done and Derek is home with us we will be having a big celebration of our own!!!!
Friday, February 01, 2008
Here you have it....
This is the update we received today. Still moving at a snails pace but things are looking up!!!
Dear families:
In the past two or three weeks, there hasn't been much progress in overcoming the last barrier to fixing the 5 child dossiers of the kids at the Lien Chieu orphanage. The population committee ex-director has been refusing to sign the five corrected “acceptance into orphanage” letters as ordered by the PC. As of this week, the PC has issued the final order to him and threatened him with severe disciplinary actions, according to what we were told. He lost his directorship last time he refused to sign the original documents, we are not sure what the severe consequences will be for him this time, should he still chooses to not cooperate.
As the Tet holidays are coming up, we don't expect some immediate results to be seen. The PC has talked about alternative plans, but we do not expect any of those to be implemented until at least a couple of weeks after the Tet. We are sure adoptive parents understand and are well aware that things work differently in Vietnam, and we want to assure you that we are diligently trying everything in our power. As a matter of fact, we have enlisted the help of the local DOJ, and were being advised that there are other ways to validate the documents without the signatures of the ex-director. While we are still lacking the details of the alternative plans, we were told that the dossiers will be ready by the end of February. We are very thankful to the DN officials who have been offering advice and assistance in dealing with this tough task. We are also very grateful to have the LC orphanage director's full cooperation in the last three months. As we had explained to parents in the beginning after discovering the child dossiers' errors, it would take some months for the dossiers to be all corrected. The progress came slowly, but also steadily as we expected so far. We incline to believe in the officials and we will be having the final results by the end of February.
Once all documents are approved by the local DOJ, they will release to CAI full sets of copies of the child dossiers. Therefore, in mid February, we will ask families to prepare the I-600 Petition Form, which are to be sent to Da Nang before the end of February. As soon as the child dossier documents are released by the local DOJ, we will have those translated in the shortest time possible and provide parents with copies of all the documents, and will send the petitions on behalf of families, to the USCIS in Ho Chi Minh City.
As a side note, some of you had sent care packages to the orphanage in Lien Chieu. We want to re-emphasize to you that it is not necessary indeed. CAI has committed to cover all the needs of all the children in the orphanage, including the ones matched with families, and the newly admitted ones, adoptable or not. That is our commitment to the Vietnamese government and Vietnamese orphaned children. Please also understand that supplies and goods in Vietnam are much cheaper than in the States. Probably only one-fifth of what you pay for here. Therefore, if you really want to have some more brand new clothings etc. for your matched child, send a check to CAI and we will have the money sent to VN. Just tell us what kind of supplies you wish to get for your child, and the associate there will do the shopping for you and provide you with receipts and a picture of the supplies purchased.
Finally, the orphanage director has been having much trouble with the camera that we provided to her for taking update pictures, and with emailing file attachments, hence the delay with providing you updated pictures and measurements. The DN associate will be going to the orphanage with his own digital camera and retrieve the measurement files shortly after the Tet holiday. He is now back in Hue, his hometown for Tet and to investigate on starting a new project there. As always, please be patient and thank you!
Sincerely,
CAI staff
This is the update we received today. Still moving at a snails pace but things are looking up!!!
Dear families:
In the past two or three weeks, there hasn't been much progress in overcoming the last barrier to fixing the 5 child dossiers of the kids at the Lien Chieu orphanage. The population committee ex-director has been refusing to sign the five corrected “acceptance into orphanage” letters as ordered by the PC. As of this week, the PC has issued the final order to him and threatened him with severe disciplinary actions, according to what we were told. He lost his directorship last time he refused to sign the original documents, we are not sure what the severe consequences will be for him this time, should he still chooses to not cooperate.
As the Tet holidays are coming up, we don't expect some immediate results to be seen. The PC has talked about alternative plans, but we do not expect any of those to be implemented until at least a couple of weeks after the Tet. We are sure adoptive parents understand and are well aware that things work differently in Vietnam, and we want to assure you that we are diligently trying everything in our power. As a matter of fact, we have enlisted the help of the local DOJ, and were being advised that there are other ways to validate the documents without the signatures of the ex-director. While we are still lacking the details of the alternative plans, we were told that the dossiers will be ready by the end of February. We are very thankful to the DN officials who have been offering advice and assistance in dealing with this tough task. We are also very grateful to have the LC orphanage director's full cooperation in the last three months. As we had explained to parents in the beginning after discovering the child dossiers' errors, it would take some months for the dossiers to be all corrected. The progress came slowly, but also steadily as we expected so far. We incline to believe in the officials and we will be having the final results by the end of February.
Once all documents are approved by the local DOJ, they will release to CAI full sets of copies of the child dossiers. Therefore, in mid February, we will ask families to prepare the I-600 Petition Form, which are to be sent to Da Nang before the end of February. As soon as the child dossier documents are released by the local DOJ, we will have those translated in the shortest time possible and provide parents with copies of all the documents, and will send the petitions on behalf of families, to the USCIS in Ho Chi Minh City.
As a side note, some of you had sent care packages to the orphanage in Lien Chieu. We want to re-emphasize to you that it is not necessary indeed. CAI has committed to cover all the needs of all the children in the orphanage, including the ones matched with families, and the newly admitted ones, adoptable or not. That is our commitment to the Vietnamese government and Vietnamese orphaned children. Please also understand that supplies and goods in Vietnam are much cheaper than in the States. Probably only one-fifth of what you pay for here. Therefore, if you really want to have some more brand new clothings etc. for your matched child, send a check to CAI and we will have the money sent to VN. Just tell us what kind of supplies you wish to get for your child, and the associate there will do the shopping for you and provide you with receipts and a picture of the supplies purchased.
Finally, the orphanage director has been having much trouble with the camera that we provided to her for taking update pictures, and with emailing file attachments, hence the delay with providing you updated pictures and measurements. The DN associate will be going to the orphanage with his own digital camera and retrieve the measurement files shortly after the Tet holiday. He is now back in Hue, his hometown for Tet and to investigate on starting a new project there. As always, please be patient and thank you!
Sincerely,
CAI staff
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